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MilesFromHerView
MilesFromHerView
43 Healing Your Relationship with Food and Fitness: A conversation with Jess
Healing Your Relationship with Food and Fitness: A Conversation with Jess
In this episode of MilesFromHerView, Kat, an experienced fitness trainer and ultra-marathon runner, hosts Jess, a licensed mental health counselor and certified personal trainer. They delve into topics such as disordered eating, body image, and emotional eating. Jess shares her journey from struggling with food and overexercise to becoming a therapist who focuses on helping women heal their relationship with food and their bodies. They discuss the toxic messaging in the fitness industry, the importance of self-compassion, and adopting a non-diet, health-at-every-size approach. Key highlights include the need for skill-building in intuitive eating, maintaining curiosity without judgment, and understanding that proper health is more than just weight loss.
Connect with Jess:
Website: https://revolutionhc.com
IG: https://www.instagram.com/jessbjamison/
D&D Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/dumbbellsanddonuts/
00:00 Introduction and Content Warning
00:42 Welcome to MilesFromHerView
01:33 Meet Jess: Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Personal Trainer
03:17 Jess's Journey with Disordered Eating and Body Image
06:40 The Toxicity of Diet Culture
13:46 Recognizing Disordered Eating Patterns
19:46 Parental Influence on Kids' Relationship with Food
20:41 Understanding Health at Every Size
22:12 Clarifying the Non-Diet Approach
27:22 Building Intuitive Eating Skills
29:30 Embracing Curiosity Over Judgment
30:18 Finding Joy in Movement
35:02 Agency Over Control in Health
37:13 Conclusion and Final Thoughts
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Before we dive into today's episode, I want to provide a quick reminder that the content discussed is intended for informational purposes only. The topics we'll be covering include disordered eating, body image, and emotional eating, are not meant to treat, diagnose, or replace professional medical advice. If you are struggling with any of these issues, we encourage you to seek support from a licensed therapist, counselor, or doctor. Or a healthcare provider. Additionally, please be aware that some of the topics in today's episode may be triggering for some listeners. If you feel that the conversation could be difficult to engage with, we recommend taking care of yourself and reaching out for support with that in mind, let's get started. Welcome to MilesFromHerView the podcast powered by KatFit strength, where busy women like you find practical solutions to fuel your fitness journey with authenticity and resilience. I'm Kat, your host, a mom of two active boys, a business owner and an ultra marathon runner and a strength trainer in her forties with nearly two decades of experience. I'm here to help you cut through the noise of fads, hacks, and quick fixes. This is a space where we celebrate womanhood and motherhood. All while building strength and resilience and reconnecting with you from a place of self compassion and worthiness. Whether you're lacing up your running shoes to go out for a run, driving your kids to practice, or squeezing in a moment for yourself, I'm right here in the trenches with you. Let's dive in. Welcome to MilesFromHerView. I'm here with Jess and Jess is a licensed mental health counselor and a certified personal trainer offering both services inside her business revolution health over nine years of experience. She supports chronic dieters finding peace with food, fitness, and their bodies. Her specialties in therapy include binge eating, emotional eating, and body image. For personal training. She specializes in helping those with mental health challenges, feel strong and confident physically through strength training and intuitive and intuitive movement. She practices from a non diet weight inclusive and health at every size approach. As someone who recovered from disordered eating and over exercise in a hair. hater her body for years. twister there. She gets it. Today. She loves lifting weights almost as much as she loves eating donuts. And I love eating donuts too. So welcome, welcome. So excited to have you here and dive into these topics. So
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Thank you for having me, Kat.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Absolutely. First, what is your favorite donut?
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Oh, it's gotta be chocolate.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Nice. I love
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah, the, like, chocolate gate glaze with the chocolate frosting. I'm all about that.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:I love it. I love it. Yeah. I love, I'm all about the chocolate, but I'm also there's something about like a Boston cream donut for me. It's like the cream, the good chocolate on top.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:that one's delicious too. I, I am, I, I will never turn down a Boston cream.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. Yeah.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:I really love this conversation.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:It's all about doughnuts today. We're just talking about doughnuts, but awesome. But how did you get to where you are? Cause I love finding people, hearing people's stories to where they got to, where they are and how,
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:ties into how they develop their business. let's dive in there.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. And I'll, I'll try to keep it as like concise as possible. And so we're not spending a whole hour on it, but I probably could. So I got here because I struggled for most of my life with food and over exercise and my body image. And I think looking back on it at the time. I didn't even realize it. Like, I think that's how much of a, like a hold that diet culture can have on us is that I thought that everything I was doing in the obsession with skinniness that I had was normal. And you know, I, I, my struggles go like way back. I think they probably started in like the eighth grade. I struggled probably at like, it was probably my worst in high school. And then when I got to college, like it just looked different, right? But like, the negative thoughts about my body were still, still on my mind all the time. But you looked at me and you were like, everyone commented on how healthy I was. Right. He looked at me physically. Like I had the body that society deems as like perfect for a woman. Right. I was thin, I was toned. Everyone thought that I ate healthy chicken and salad all the time. But my mental health was a hot mess. I. Had injuries like crazy. Like I think like I tore a hamstring, I broke my arm. Like I broke several other smaller bones. Like I had just burnt myself like into the ground. Like and it, things really shifted for me when I decided that I wanted to have a family and I couldn't get pregnant. And I would say that's when I really started healing and taking a hard look at what I was doing that I thought was healthy, but. Really wasn't. I was, you know, there was, it was undiagnosed infertility. That's how they labeled me. So there was nothing that they could find that was wrong with me. But looking back, like I really wasn't, I wasn't healthy and my body couldn't carry a baby. And I think it was just trying to tell me that. So then I have two kids now. I spent years working as a personal trainer in the weight loss industry. Really. Then realizing that I was helping women with this, like do the same things to themselves to try to lose weight. That hurt me so badly. And once I, I realized like that that was when I transitioned into the health at every size anti diet space,
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:And started my therapy practice or where I am now. And I still do offer personal training, but in a much different way because I've completely left the weight loss industry. And really now focus on helping women heal and find peace. Because I know what it's like to, to now be on the other side.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. This is so important. One of the things that appealed to me to have you on is your philosophy of like, you're a personal trainer. You're also a therapist. Anyone has known me and followed my business I'm anti diet. I'm going to bash on the fitness industry cause I do it all the time.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Oh, same.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:so it's, there's so the messaging there is so toxic. And I always say I was the only job I was fired from in my life is this current profession I'm in now is personal training. Because I refuse to go along with this messaging that was truly hurtful for two individuals, predominantly females in the essence of shrink your body at all costs, which Was not healthy, but deemed in this pretty little package as being healthy. And to your point, and what you said earlier was in your, with your story of people saw you and you were commenting on how healthy you looked, but you were not healthy. And I think, you know, that is something that is so important that someone can look but they're not healthy. And that's. We, we put thinness and you know, at such a high on a pedestal as the epitome of health and fitness. And that is not the case at all. Yeah, it's, yeah. And I love, I mean, there's so much, I see it too, where individuals that, you know, we both work with women, that they've had a disordered. eating cycle their whole life which is, And I'd love to hear your thoughts on that, especially from like a therapist
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:yeah. Yeah, sure. You, you can't take the therapist out of the trainer. You can't take the trainer out of the therapist. So it's, I'm a whole, I'm a whole package deal. Yeah, so it's, it's so normalized. And with me, like, so again, my struggles, my struggles started like in high school, but like, I went, I went to an all girls high school. Right. So that was part of it was like, I was around girls who were throwing out their lunch every day, so I did too, right? I was around girls who would just go to Starbucks on free period and get a coffee and that's all that we had for the entire day. It was like this challenge that like everyone's in it together. And if you didn't do it, you didn't fit in. So I spent most of those years trying to fit in. That's really what it was. Like I, I wasn't like, everyone's like, well, you know, were you hiding it? Like, no, I just thought it was normal. And then same thing in college, like. I would wake up, I'd go swimming with my roommate at like six o'clock in the morning and then I'd go back to the gym in between classes and then at night I would go rock climbing or I had club tennis practice and everyone would be like, Oh my gosh, you're back at the gym again. Good for you. Like, Oh, I saw you here yesterday. You're back. Good for you. When I broke my arm, I was literally on an elliptical with my arm in a sling. And everyone's like, good for you. Like, I could, you know, like, I couldn't do that. Right. It was all like praise. Not only was it seen as normal, but it was praised. And I don't think that, I think that's why we don't recognize how deeply we're struggling. It's because, you know, we are just surrounded by diet culture all the time. And this, this emphasis on, on weight loss all the time, and that if you just, if you lose the weight, you'll be happy, right? Your whole life is going to get better if you can just, Control your food and find discipline to exercise, be disciplined to exercise. We're not, we're not factoring our, our mental health.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Right.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Oh, cause that's something that you can't look at someone and see.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Exactly. And to your point too I hear a lot is putting their happiness their future, like a number on
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Hmm.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:a
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:and I hear that a lot with my clients. And one of the things I asked them, know, is, well, what if you do all the things and nothing changes? Because that can be a reality too. And like, it's not that, strength training is bad and it was unproductive. If you don't see these changes, no, there's a lot of factors that go into play. I cringe and maybe you share this too. I cringe certain times of the year because these, these programs are sold to well in, 30 days or like six weeks, you will have this transformation and it's put on and it's steeped in this diet culture of losing weight and all your problems will go away if you follow this program. And oftentimes they are these, I call them white knuckling. It's, you know, eat this, don't eat that. There's vilified food. There's like intense routines and it exacerbates the issue. at hand of really finding, sit down to any food. We'll, we'll use donuts, like
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:sit down to a donut and enjoy a donut. Like there's nothing wrong with having donuts. There's nothing wrong with not seeing a vegetable. And one thing I do, especially with my clients who are newly in that postpartum stage or going through a very intense, like life is at a level 10. I'm like, if you don't see a vegetable on your plate this whole week, because you're just surviving, okay.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Oh, I love that. Yeah, I think I, I agree so much. And I think that the biggest thing that keeps people stuck is that all or nothing thinking and this belief that we have to follow all of these external rules.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:yes,
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:you know, I tell my clients all the time, like we got to get rid of that. Should that word should is only going to get you into trouble.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:it so is. I would say I'm like, I said this to my kid and I said, it's so fast. My, my older son is 13 and I was like, would you stop shooting yourself? He's like, mom, why'd you swear at me? I said, had to stop and think, I'm like, did I swear? I was like, like, he's like, only the like S word. I was like. I'm like, that's what I said. And I said, well, it's pretty much like a barb word. Stop shooting yourself. I'm like, it's
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:like literally like. You know, the, the, the swear word, like, yes, like it, that keeps on the guilt and the shame and
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Mm
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:You shouldn't, you know, there's no should or anything. It's just I hate to be like it is what it is But know it like you said it keeps you in that perfection seeking model and something that is to the heavens, especially in the fitness gonna say in the nutrition, like in that whole wellness is if you're not doing it all, then, you're gonna fail. That is we know it. That is not the case. That is so not the case.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah, absolutely.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:I would love to hear a little bit more insight and, you know, definitely I'm a big proponent of you know, if you want to use yourself as an example, I always tend to use myself because I don't always like to use client examples, how could someone tell, like if they're caught in that, dieting cycle that you know, maybe they're like, I don't know, do I, and again, and I said it before, before the intro is this is not here. We're not here to diagnose. We're here to be informative and understand, you know, to provide insight. But like if someone is like, I don't know, could I have disordered eating? This sounds like, you know, sharing your story sounds similar to me. This is something I've struggled.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. So I always tell clients, I don't necessarily care what you're eating and what you're doing for exercise. I care how you're thinking about it.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:love that.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:So. If, if you're questioning, right, if what you're going through is normal and if what you're experiencing is, is disordered or something like, Oh, thank you. Like, I think you're going to be able to tell like deep down in your gut, right? I think you're going to know that, but I want you to pay attention to like your thoughts about food and exercise. And if they're coming from a place of love and self care, That's very different than them coming from a place of shame and judgment. I think that's the key, right? So are you making food choices because you think you should, right? Is this coming from some external place that someone told you, this is how you should eat this way. Again, are there feelings of if I don't eat that, or I do eat that, I feel really bad about myself. I feel guilty. Same thing with the, on the fitness side. If I, you know, if I, Don't do this workout. How does that make you feel about yourself? Right? Are we feeling that we're lazy, that we're, that we're, we're worthless, that we're never gonna be able to do this, right? If that's, if that's how you're thinking about it, then that signals to me that you're really struggling.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:I think I answered your question.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:it does. A hundred percent. Yeah.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Okay.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:like, and that's a different, because again, the industry, it's how it's like, know your macros. Know your calories have to be in a calorie deficit where it doesn't, I'm gonna say consider the person and you have to like, there's so much that goes behind it because we are
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Oh
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:We are not, I loathe the statement, you know, calories in, calories out, we
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:my gosh.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:we are not calculators, like, there's so many more factors than that, and also like, and I a lot to my clients about, the holiday times, getting through the holidays, we eat To bond. We have an emotional response with eating. We, social beings and around holidays and my family, we're very big on a lot of traditional foods. And, like eat the food, spend the time with the person because the reality too, is whoever made. Such and so dish may not be here the next holiday and not eat and fear for that, but like sit there and enjoy one meal is not going to break your entire fitness goal or nutrition goal.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. We, we don't have to make all of this mean so much, like we don't have to make eating one dessert. Mean so much about ourselves and about our worth and we don't have to make one skipped workout mean so much in the big right in the big picture and I think That's where the woman that I see Really struggle with like they're they are making those things Mean so much more than they have to about themselves Same
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:And I'll also say like, to the point, one of the things that I, when my kids started getting older, It started triggering me on like how I talk about food and my workouts. It became, you know, something that realized, I, I think we all have a complex relationship with our bodies and with our moving our bodies. Then when having kids, I was like. Well, we should never have any of this. And I'm like, well, why shouldn't we? Like, it's teaching them to eat. Responsibly of like all foods can hit fit into a healthy diet. All movement can fit into a movement and strength training plan. Like all of this can fit here. It's when we start to like restrict, we have to know why. And You know, that's where it was interesting as my older son, he's now in eighth grade, like going through and hearing the nutrition things, he's like, well, mom, fat is bad. And I'm like, well, okay, well
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:that. did you know your brain needs fat to function?
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And it's, it's, it's so interesting because my kids are really little. So I have a two year old. Oh no, she's three. Oh my God. She's three. She turned three this month. And a five year old and kids are such intuitive eaters, right? To watch my kids eat. I'm, it's like, it's still shocks me sometimes how intuitive they are and how. Easily that just as we get older, it's just, it's taken from us, right? And it can be the little things like, you know, in, in part of my story too, is I, I grew up with a mom who was always on the diet, right. Always all the time. I don't like bounced from one to another and I would do them with her again. I thought that was normal, but you know, it's, we as parents can have so much influence, you know, on our kids relationship with food, but like you said, how we're talking to them. So I'm super careful. I'm super intentional What I say, just as you are, because I want to raise little intuitive eaters as best that I can, and I know I can control everything but because, you know, to, to bring women back to that ability to tune into their bodies. Damn, it's really hard. It's really hard.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:so hard, so hard. You're a trainer who gets it. I know other trainers and like therapists who get it, and you know who also share the specialty that you do, therapist and trainer and it's the stuff that we do I would say is Unsexy because it's not flashy.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:I would love to hear more of your thoughts on like health at every size
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. I mean, I, I, in everything that I do, you know, whether that's eating disorder work or personal training, I practice from a health at every size approach. And I guess what that means, right? Like, so it's based on like five principles. So weight inclusivity, health enhancement, respectful care. Eating for wellbeing and life enhancing movement. And. All of this supports building healthy habits as opposed to a fixation on weight, right, or weight loss. So it's a, I like to see it as health at every size is a focus on health gain rather than weight loss. I think it's a simple way to, it's just like a simple way to put it. That does not mean. That we are healthy at every size,
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:right.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:right? Like, and I think that's where you were talking about. It's, it's misconstrued a lot, right? Cause it's, it's not, that's not what health at every size means. It does not mean that you are in a healthy body at any size. It just means that you can be healthy at any size. I don't know about you, that made sense.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:it, it totally makes sense. And, and that's where things get so nuanced and then misconstrued, and I feel it's the same with like the, like the non diet approach because like, Diet. What the non diet approach is, is looking at, understanding and decoding you, what do you like to eat? What do you not like to eat?
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Mm hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And I love how we're talking about what these things actually mean because you're right like that That even that term like non diet has become like so trendy
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:like I'll be on social media and I'll see a post as someone who's like calling themselves like a non diet Dietitian or trainer a nutritionist or coach and I'm like that's not what that means You could like that what they're saying is they take in all foods fit all foods fit approach to weight loss That is not what a non diet approach means Just clarify that. So like when I say I'm non diet, that means I do not focus on weight loss as a goal. That does not mean that I am against weight loss, right? That does not mean that I think that having weight loss goals is a bad thing. Like it just means that as we work together and we make some of these changes in regards to fitness and nutrition, I don't know what's going to happen to your body. I don't know what's going to happen to your size. And I don't, that's not where we're, where our focus is. Right, where someone's taking an all foods fit approach to weight loss, the intentional goal is weight loss. Mm
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:And I think that's a huge distinction right there. And I. You know, I think there, there is a vast majority of individuals out there, both male and female, who are looking to have a body composition change, and they're led to believe the only way to obtain that through a diet or putting a numerical number on the amount of. inches, pounds they want to lose. And that is not always the case to have, to find health,
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:hmm.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:that, you know, hate to say ambiguous because it is very different for each person. You know, I was kind of talking to my clients, I'm like, there's kind of like a fit you want to feel in your clothes, in your body, a focus you want to have and you know, overall feeling. And it's like, That is where, you know, want to decode that we want to, you know, there's going to be that work in the beginning when we're integrating the workouts and getting on that, you know, consistent. You know, pattern and incorporating into your life. But then we also want to look at like, there's going to be a maintenance period where you're not, or it's going to feel good and you feel like, cool. I'm, know, I'm going to use every Friday night's pizza night in our house. It started,
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Nice. Mm hmm.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:we got to Friday and we were like, I can't think and it's first pizza and like sometimes we throw a veggie bar, sometimes we just plain frozen pizza. So, you know, it is what it is. Like, we all look forward to it. But it's like, you can sit down and be like. This is part of my meal plan. This is something that fires me up. This is something that like I enjoy eating, you know, it's like we get to those periods of like, we're not always, and I hate saying gain or loss, but we're not like, no one should be in a constant, like I have to work on myself all the time and make myself better.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Mm hmm. Mm hmm.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:living. It's
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:that.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:yeah. It's finding that peace, that autonomy where it flows together.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. Yeah. I, I think that the weight loss industry makes us feel like we are this project that we have to fix.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yes.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:And I don't think that our, our health is, is a project, you know, like I want to, yeah, I want to help women get out of that mindset. Like you do not need to be fixed.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Exactly. Exactly. That's it. I mean, I fullheartedly agree with that. There's, yeah, there's, you're not broken. need to be fixed. To me. I am like, you seem to be more of you. Like I
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:tell my clients, I'm like, I want you to take up space. I want you to feel that power. And so sometimes like, I'll talk about it when I'm like queuing them for, Squats or deadlift. I'm like, I want you to feel the ground underneath your feet, connect with, and I want you to press up through the body, feel that power that you can generate
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yes. Yeah.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:I would love to hear, so if someone's listening to this and they're like, Everything that you're saying I'm overwhelmed. I need, I need someone to away this overwhelm. I really want to get out of this like diet cycle, this all or nothing. And I really just want to sit down to insert whatever meal I want to have that donut and just really enjoy all of its goodness. Like where should I start is like, what would be? I
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. I know it's it's so hard and because I I also think that like The, the word like intuitive eating is all over the place, right? Because, right, but it is often used as a diet, right? And we don't want that. And, and I, to become a true intuitive eater in a non diet way does take a lot of work. And we cannot go from following all of these diets and rules. To being an intuitive eater. Like you just can't, you cannot just be like, I'm just going to stop dieting and listen to my body. That's not how it works.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:You will set yourself up for failure because. You don't have the skills yet, right? So I think that's where I typically start with a woman who come to me with particularly binge eating and emotional eating challenges. So we need to build those skills first. And I think around eating, right. But also just around like. intuition in general, right? And making sure that we, we know how to, how to tune into ourselves outside of food and exercise. So we work on, you know, building those skills and that's gonna look like noticing hunger and fullness, right, is a big one. So, Go Google, right, the hunger and fullness scale and just start making notes, right? Another huge thing here is you have to approach this from a place of curiosity,
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yes,
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:not judgment, right? How can I just get curious about this? Right? Like I think like using phrase like I wonder is super powerful. Like, wow. Like I wonder why I overate that day. Right? I wonder why. I was really full, but I kept eating like, what could have been going on? What could have been going on there for me? Right. Versus I can't believe I did that. I knew I didn't need that. I wasn't hungry, but I ate it anyways. Oh my goodness. Like I have to start over again tomorrow. Right. Like that place of curiosity versus judgment is so powerful. And then, I mean, we're personal trainers, right? We want people to fall in love with, with fitness and movement. So I think it's going to work the same that way too. Like. What do you love to do for movement? Right? What actually brings you joy? Start trying new things and pay attention to how do they actually make me feel. And I think to do that, like again, you, you gotta go into it as a little experiment, right? Because you're not, you're never going to find what like lights you up and makes you feel empowered. If we don't put ourselves out there and try new things and kind of get ourselves out of our comfort zone a little bit. And then I think a really powerful question I ask my clients a lot is like, what would you do if you weren't afraid of gaining weight? Or just not losing it, right? What would you do if you weren't afraid? How would you eat? How would you move your body? What would you wear? And whatever those answers are, I want you to go do that.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah, I think that's so powerful and I want to highlight a few things you said there because I feel like, like,
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:I know, that's a very long answer.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:no, but it was so good. I'm sitting here, I'm like, yes, yes, all these things and like, skills, I feel Again, in this industry, nutrition industry acts like it is a switch. You just, you do this and it's a
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah! Oh my gosh.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:to build up the skills.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:doesn't work like that.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:There are
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Mmhmm.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:that you need for that. It is, you know, I liken it. I mean, you're a mom, I'm a mom. Like we, you, you watch your child. Accumulate skills to move their body. They don't just, you know, stand up one day and start running. You know,
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Mmhmm.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:that because that is such a busy time and motherhood, but like, they have to build those skills. It's the same thing when you're creating this transition. You have to incorporate these skills. It's not a, know, do this and X, y, z happens. Like, that's like. That's what diet culture is. It's such a restrictive, like, puts you in a little tiny box. There's no, you know, curiosity to your next thing is huge. Just having that curiosity of like, like, why did I get here? Like, you know, and I love for me, it's one of the coolest things when clients are like, they can articulate. I realized when I was standing in the pantry, this hypothetical, but wait. And I was stuffing my space full of whatever that I missed lunch because it was so
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Mmhmm. Mmhmm.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:make sure, or tonight I did this to make sure I have food tomorrow because it's another busy day. Amazing. You set yourself up for success. You didn't go down the shoulds, the like, guilt, the shame. You had this. Explore curiosity of why these behaviors happen, because there's a reason and it doesn't mean that it's bad. There's just a reason. And I think are just so powerful. And then the other one is huge. I often, I ask similar question and don't know if you find this when you ask this to your clients, but it stops them of like, wait, no one's ever asked me that.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Life is busy and it's loud and we, I don't know, life just starts happening to us. Even if we're doing things, sometimes life starts happening or like the cues, like be mindful of what you're eating or understand the hunger scale, it's easy to tune out. If you're so hungry or not, or when you get hungry and even myself, I've had to be like, Ooh, we're not, I'm not utilizing or understanding my hunger. So like I employ that because life gets busy and
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:does.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:is one of those that these seem basic, but these are skills implement to set you up for success. But the best thing they love is that curiosity. And if you had no fear we're, yeah, I just think it puts more power. And more autonomy to to take hold of their health and really find that, that central, I'm going to say like control that central North, like deep internal as to what they really, really want.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Mm hmm. Yeah. And, and I love everything you just said. And I'll add, like, I think we want to be in control, right. Of what we eat and our health even so badly. And I do encourage women to stop using that word. Like you, you cannot control your health. Like what you can do is have agency, right. You can influence. Your health, right? But that idea of like, I have to control what I eat or I have to get control of my weight, that's, that's, that's only going to make this so much harder for you and unsustainable. And it's just not like so much goes into that. It's, it's not in your control. That is so outcome based and the outcome isn't in our control. So thinking about where, you know, where can I have agency? Is, is typically what I, how I like to phrase it.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. I love that. Like agency is important and it is I always say, bodies change. That's it. That's a statement. It's
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:that's a complete sentence.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:I love that. I'm gonna steal that.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. I,
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. Oh
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:I say the clients are like, and I'm like, no, that's, that's a two words. it. Bodies change.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yeah. We can, right. builds habits that feel good for us, that we feel are healthy, that make us feel healthy. But how that's going to change our weight and our body size again, like we just don't know. And I think having those weight loss goals that were that were so hung up on It really only interferes with our act, our ability to actually heal our relationship with food and fitness. Like I honestly have yet to work with a woman yet who has been able to do both at the same time. Someone out there will prove me wrong, but yet to see that.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:yeah. I would encourage anyone listening reach out to Jess. If you, I'm going to say, if you have questions, her information will be on the show notes. Because there are other ways to find, your true health for you and for your lifestyle versus White knuckling, you know, restriction, brutalizing your body.
jess---she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:yeah. And I think that's a, that's a great message maybe to leave your listeners with as we wrap up. Like it, the food noise, the shame around fitness, right. And all of those shoulds that you're experiencing, like, yeah, it, it doesn't have to be like that.
kat--she-her-_1_01-28-2025_132054:Yes. A hundred percent. A hundred percent. This is awesome. I'm sure we'll have you back. And you know, anyone listening to you can send questions to the podcast or get justice information. And we will, you know, the conversation doesn't end. So, yeah, and if you know, if anyone could benefit from this episode, please, you know, share it with them. Thank you for tuning in to MilesFromHerView powered by KatFit strength. If this podcast inspires you, don't keep it for yourself, hit follow or subscribe to stay updated on the new episodes and leave us a review to help more women and moms discover this space. Your feedback fuels this podcast, and I'd love to hear what's working for you or what topics you want to dive into next. You can connect with me on Instagram at KatFit strength, or share this episode. It's about showing up for yourself and finding strength in every step of your journey until next time, keep moving forward one mile at a time.
